Sunday, September 29, 2013

what college is all about







































Here is college summed up in one post.....
I go into the living room and say to Brooklyn,
"Dude, we should totally go steal some bikes and go on a bike ride."
(Fully expecting her to say no because the idea is crazy).
But....she says yes!
We call up some friends and they say yes as well.
We proceed to find all the bikes that aren't locked up.
And take them for a nice little ride around campus.
Then ever so kindly we return the bikes to where we found them.
The lesson learned was that every idea must be spoken out loud.
No matter how crazy or dumb.
Because sometimes those ideas turn into the funnest nights.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

punk







































The other day I tried to dress like a punk because I didn't want anybody to talk to me.
It didn't work though.
In fact, I think that it did the opposite.
I forget that BYU was built on rainbows and pixie dust.
Too many people in one place means that the odds for someone talking to you is greater.
I guess it wasn't all bad though.
I learned a few new jokes and someone gave me free milk.
(It was gross milk, but still free milk.)
And bishop must have been getting worried about me.
Cause I got an official calling.
FHE group leader!
Next time I don't want anybody to talk to me I will just have to wear a sign.
Cause trying to be a punk clearly doesn't work.




Perfectly Coutured

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

during the rain







































Tonight at seven o clock when my final class got out it was raining.
I finally got to use my umbrella that I have been lugging to campus every day.
Can I get an amen and a hallelujah?
Even though I loved the rain, it was a bit chilly for my holey jeans and short sleeves.
So I stopped in the RB to sit outside the pool and warm up.
(I know it's weird, but it works wonders.)
This was five minutes of bliss.
I had my headphones in and was listening to some sweet jams.
I had no obligation to talk to anybody.
I had no obligation to think about anything.
I had no reason to be stressed out.
I had no reason to be self-conscious.
I had no reason to feel inadequate.
Life was so simple in this five minutes.
And that's all I needed to motivate me to finish the day.
Just five minutes.
I could've sat there all day but then I remembered that eating is an important thing to do.
So I jumped back into the hustle and bustle of life.
And immediately wrote "Alone time" in my planner for the weekend.
Sometimes it's needed, ya know?

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

scaring my roommate


































(Hiding in the kitchen closet waiting to scare my roommates)


I love to scare people.
I have my whole life. 
For one, it's hillarious.
Also, it's interesting to see how people react when they think someone's attacking them.
I think that most people would not survive because they would cower or dance around.
Or any other assortment of ridiculous things that people do when they get scared.
This weekend I tried scaring my roommate Kathleen.
On Saturday night I thought she was about ready to come to bed.
So I hid and got ready to pop out.
Well, she didn't come to bed.
I waited about an hour before falling asleep in my hiding spot.
Sunday night rolled around and I was as wide awake as Katy Perry.
I knew I had to try again.
So as she comes into the room thinking I'm asleep on my bed I prepare myself.
When she's done saying her prayers and about ready to get into bed,
I whisper "Boo".
She dances around the room for a solid thirty seconds and then jumps onto her bed.
And throws a pillow at me.
Her first line of defense. 
Pretty solid protection right there.
Maybe I will try again tonight.

Sunday, September 22, 2013

sunday funnies


I love Pinterest along with the rest of America.
But there are a few people that sadly don't participate in the fun.
So I want to share some of the funniest things I found this week on the world wide web.



















funny-lacoste-croc-shirt
 Via



funny-under-rain-romance-guy

Via


funny-kid-stuck-sofa-play

Via




Via


http://i.imgur.com/Qqj3mqz.jpg

Via




Saturday, September 21, 2013

you're getting better

Dear Provo,
OK, you are getting better.
Last week you reminded me how much I love pranking.I enjoyed that.
Then the spark of hope grew after having live music on campus.
You introduced me to awesome people.
And you had people give me lots of desserts (which I always love. obviously.)
All of this was fine and dandy.
And then last night happened.
And it all came flooding back.
And I was reminded why I love college.
After a long day of sleeping and homework,
Brooklyn and I went rock climbing.
(I think every good weekend starts out with rock climbing.)
She was a natural and maybe me new climbing partner? ;)






































Then it was party time.
My good friend Rylie came over and we headed to....an institute dance.
Pretty posh I would say.






























We got our fill of Swedish fish and weird mormon men.
So after dancing our hearts out we left.
With the destination of party number two in mind.
We dropped off Rylie and picked up Alexa.
When we got to the party we had no other choice but to break in.
(You gotta do what you gotta do.)
Strobe lights were going and techno music was playing, we had just moshed, and I saw a man being thrown in the air.
I knew what I had to do.
I went up to the men having the most fun.
(Ironically they were the men throwing their friend in the air.)
And I asked them what a girl had to do to crowd surf.
Shouts of excitement were shared and I was picked up and thrown into the air.
This moment was very anti-climatic.
It last about twenty seconds.
A bucket list item crossed off?
Yes.
In exchange for a lot of people touching my butt?
Yes.
But I must repeat this.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
So thank you Provo.
You're getting better.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

never say never

 <Insert picture of a mop bucket here>


(This is the only picture that I have that has any remote connection to my job. Therefore.....toilet paper.)

This is not a direct quote from the Biebs.
Just good advice to follow.
So, let the story begin.
When I was a young miss of 14 years old I got my first real job as a custodian (sweeper).
At the elementary school.
It was my destiny.
Both my older sisters worked there (and both my younger siblings now as well).
After three long years working there I got fired for being a chatty kathy.
I walked out of there and said "Never will I ever be a custodian again."
Two and a half years later at SUU....
I got a job as a custodian.
Just as miserable, but this time I didn't get fired.
I changed schools.
And as I walked out on my last day I said "Never will I ever be a custodian again."
Three months later at BYU.....
I got my current job.
As a custodian.
It's a curse I've decided.
Anyways, after all these years of experience I have learned some things from this glamorous job.
1. I've gotten REALLY good at Solitaire. Like, I-could-win-competitions-good.
2. My favorite part about work is that I perform my own rock concert every day. Leave me alone in an empty building with music and I will be jamming. I am positive that every custodian does this. I have caught many others doing it. I worry how many have caught me....
3. Sometimes you just need to buck up and touch gross things. Especially in the women's locker room. Bleh.
4. Along with #3, girls are disgusting. After comparing the men's and women's locker rooms I have concluded that we are the grosser species.
5. Also, they must have designed the locker room after a woman's mind because it is a labyrinth. 
6. You get to learn your co-workers real well. There is an astounding amount of down time that is spent learning the deepest depths of each other's lives
7. Last but not least, adults poop on the ground too. Yes. Don't put it past a faculty member to drop a deuce on the locker room floor.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

in case you needed a smile...

Here's a video of a dog walking on two legs.
It's cute when she walks.
But then she runs and it's even cuter.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

differences








































I have been at BYU long enough to notice some differences between BYU and SUU.
Let me enlighten you.
>First. There is an astounding amount of people here. Like, too many. It takes me approximately 10 minutes to get out of my parking lot. It makes me a bit hostile.
>Yes, SUU had an absurd amount of stairs but I think BYU has more. Which saddens me. Stairs are absolutely evil. I have to concentrate on keeping my breathing even so nobody around me knows just how out of shape I am. But honestly, it doesn't matter how in shape you are-these stairs will still get ya.
>Prayers are said at the beginning of every one of my classes here. Sign up sheets for thought and prayer were even passed out the first day of classes. That's something that wouldn't happen at SUU, that's for sure!
>Only at BYU can your religion classes be harder than any of your other classes.
>One of my teachers brings a vase of fresh flowers to sit on the front table during class. I feel like I'm in relief society whenever I go to her class.
>It is normal for people to bring their babies to class, whereas at SUU it was specifically stated in some of my syllabi that children were not welcome in class. BYU chooses not to discriminate. They promote the baby-making.
>I have been able to get free food here (I walked past a vending machine one day and the girl changing the food asked if I wanted any of the food that hadn't been sold. Uh....YES.) but SUU supplied a TON more free food and I usually didn't even have to buy food the first week of school.
>You have to pay for prints here. What?? I am often caught without money on my card and so I turn in a lot of assignments late. (OK. Only two.) It drives me crazy though. It's the little things.
>Maybe it's because it's the second week of school but so far they are a lot more lax with parking. At SUU if I parked out of the lines of the stall I would get a ticket (not even kidding. It happened a couple times.) but I have parked in employee parking twice (mostly because I have no idea where student parking is) and haven't been ticketed. It's quite the gamble. But I would say I'm winning.
>It's quite the luxury that fast food places stay open past 7 here. That is something I won't miss about Cedar City. When I want ice cream at 11 at night I expect to get ice cream from a greasy fast food joint and not from a tub at Wal-Mart.
>You don't have to worry about your roommates doing questionable things here (at least openly). That is quite the reassurance.
>I have left the land of the jay-walkers, that's for sure. People actually use the crosswalks here...weird.
>But putting all of these differences aside, the one difference that makes me the most sad is casino night. At SUU that was my favorite night of the whole year. Do you think BYU offers a school-promoted casino night though? That's a big fat NO. Maybe I will just have to host my own.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

more confessions and observations

>Finding free wi-fi in public is the equivalent of pirates finding their treasure.

>Awkwardly making eye contact with someone. But not just once. Doing it over and over again. I think you both are just checking to make sure the other has stopped staring at you. Nope they haven't. And neither have you.

>As a nanny when I wanted to eat a treat and wanted it all to myself I would hide in the pantry until I was done eating it so the kids wouldn't see.

>Along the nanny line.....whenever the kids would see a spider they would request for me to kill it. I don't like spiders. Or killing them. So I would hit the wall in the general area of the spider and then tell the kids that I had killed it.No real attempts were ever actually made to kill the spiders.

>I have a secret love for Hannah Montana. I saw every episode and if there is ever a re-run I will for sure be watching it. I also loved the movie. She's a musical genius.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

the national parks










































My Saturday was a LOT better than my Friday.
I think that the only times I have actually done fun stuff in Provo is when my friend from Utah State comes down.
Kidding.
But only a little.
Anyways, The National Parks were playing at Velour on Saturday.
So naturally we went because they are amazing.
I urge everyone to check them out.
They are a local Provo band.
(And I would just like to point out that I know one of the girls. I feel pretty cool.)
And of course, all of the hipsters in town showed up.
I've never seen so many skinny ankle pants and lense-less glasses in one place before.
But it was ok.
The stuffed fox on stage made up for all of the sweaty bodies.




Saturday, September 7, 2013

last friday night







































The first Friday spent in Provo was.....a dissapointment.
First, I spent some time in the library doing homework with Nate.
(Happy?)
Then, my roommates were all gone.
So since I don't know many people in this big ol' city I decided to get a redbox.
(And gorge myself with Oreos of course.)
I head to the Maverik Redbox and.....
It was made for strictly Spanish readers.
It was going berserk and nobody could figure out how to work it.
So I headed to Smith's and guess who I saw?
My forty-something divorced boss.
Doing the same thing with her Friday as I was.
The dissapointment was heavy.
So I headed home empty handed and broken hearted.
Then....the wifi stopped working.
So it was just me, Def Leopard, and Pat Benatar having a dance party.
I also tested the slippery-ness of my wood floors with various towels and blankets.
Yup, it's not slippery.
I about face planted it multiple times.
Shameless selfies were taken as well.
Thanks for the welcome Provo.
Maybe you can calm it down a bit next week?
Please, for me?
And if any Provo citizens wanna help me get over my hate for this city, feel free to try.

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

and so it begins








































School has reconvened.
And just look at that stack of books.
I spent way too much than I cared to on these darned texts.
And riding my bike home with all of these books in tow was quite the feat.
Last night I started dreading the beginning of school.
I just wanted to go back to the cabin from this weekend.
But I had to face it.
So I ride my bike to school and head to my first class.
I find it with ease and take a seat.
All of a sudden the students start talking about how this is the room for chemistry.
I was one thousand percent positive that I did not sign up for chemistry so I went into the hall to sit in my confusion.
I was in the right building.....in the right room.....
And then it hit me.
It's TUESDAY!
Not Monday.
So I ran to my Tuesday class and all was well.
Come on BYU, why do ya gotta confuse me like that and start classes on a Tuesday?
Besides the slip up from this morning I would say that today was a very successful day.
Now to the climbing gym for a bit of a release.