rules of life

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I have compiled a list of ten things that every person should remember in life.

1. Never fart in the shower.
2. Never pick your nose in the car.
3. Never tell a child a secret.
4. Always shed a tear or tear when you need something from a man.
5. Never picture someone's pooping face. Especially if you're kissing them.
6. Always consult a child when you need the truth.
7. Never get caught cheating. Ya idiot.
8. Never say "I love you" when ending a phone call with your boss.
9. Never put showering last when prioritizing your to-do list.
10. Always check for mold on your food before you eat it.