Sunday, June 28, 2015

kids are liars

Kids are liars.
And according to a recent study done by some fancy school, kids that are better liars are also smarter.
Good for them.
Honestly, I wish more kids were liars.
Because I don't particularly wanna hear that this sweater makes me look like Santa Claus.
Or that my haircut makes me look like your brother.
Honesty from kids is just too honest.
Anywho, back to what you came to this blog for: me.
And this is my lying story:
I'm sure you all remember back in 5th grade when everyone had to go to maturation and learn about their changing bodies.
And we learned more about puberty and body odor and hair in weird places.
Well, after this little party, it was the hottest thing in elementary to be going through puberty.
If you wanted to be cool, you had to be going through puberty.
As if it was the equivalent of getting your license first.
However, I had no idea what the heck puberty really was.
(And let's be honest...I still don't)
BUT I wanted to be the coolest of my friends.
So I told a little lie.
I told them that I was going through puberty.
And they wanted to hear all about it with all of the gory details of course.
And I had 'em, thanks to library books and Seventeen magazine.
I knew what I was talking about and nobody was the wiser.
But, sitting at home one day, I knew I had to go a step further.
I had to make this lie even more believable.
Nothing was worse than getting caught in a puberty lie in elementary.
So obviously I knew that I had to make my posterity know of this lie too.
I had to write it in my journal.
And that's why, in my fifth grade journal, you can see written in pink pen:
"Today I started my puberty."
Which obviously shows that I didn't know what puberty was......

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