Monday, March 9, 2015

Crazy, not "crazy"

When did "crazy" become a word with such a bad connotation?
True, the dictionary doesn't cut the word any slack in the negative department.
But "crazy" has a whole separate meaning: extremely enthusiastic, passionate.
When I was going through all of my depression at BYU I seriously thought that I was "crazy".
I would think this all of the time.
And I would just tell myself that once I found someone that loved me then I would be just fine.
But ya know what?
I found that someone and I'm still Crazy.
(If not more so)
I told my cousin that it was actually kind of comforting to know that I was still Crazy.
Because it meant that I had never lost who I was.
I wasn't being "crazy", I was being Crazy: in the better sense of the word.
I was depressed because I was being extremely passionate about people.
I was just being enthusiastic about the Gospel.
And when those things weren't Crazy about me I got sad.
So even though most days I have the "Ugh. I'm so "crazy"" feeling,
Most of the time I get the "Yeah, I'm Crazy and I like it" feeling.
And for those that think this post is just something nice to read as you pass the time, think again.
We are all Crazy.
(Some are bad "crazy" but....most people are just good Crazy.)
We are all extremely passionate and enthusiastic about something.
And we all have that thing that makes us different: a past, a struggle, an illness.....something that others don't quite understand.
And all of those give us something.
Maybe it's passion to live better, to do better, to run a marathon, to climb Everest, to enter a chosen career.
Or maybe the passion hasn't been found yet.
(Let's be honest. I was "crazy" for a long time before I realized I was Crazy.)
Whatever it is though, we are all Crazy.
So let's embrace the Crazy and not be ashamed of it.
We're not "crazy" as the world sees it.
We're just becoming passionate.
(At least this is what I say to make myself feel better when I might actually be  being "crazy"....)

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