Saturday, November 2, 2013


I went on a hike yesterday.
By myself.
I thought it would be a freeing and reflective experience.
And it was.
It takes a whole lot more will power to make it to the top when you are by yourself.
But then after my reflecting I regretted going by myself.
I had temporarily sat down on a bench to take a rest and I set my hand down next to me.
And I set it down right on a wasp.
And that beast stung me good.
As I gripped my hand a look of horror crossed my face, I'm sure.
Because the last time I got stung (as a child) I passed out and woke up later on my couch.
I started having visions of passing out and dying and nobody finding my body for weeks.
So I mentally began writing my will.
My Quarry pass was to go to Brooklyn.
My clothing was to go to charity.
My unicycle (Ok, Tyler's unicycle) would be buried with me.
My Pokemon cards would go to Kathy.
Paul's harness would be returned to him.
My pillow would go to Eric.
And the rest could be scavenged.
I texted Brooklyn to tell her that I might not make it down the mountain and that she would be receiving a gift from me from beyond the veil.
About halfway down the mountain I started getting dizzy (this could've been from lack of water...)
And my hand started swelling.
The end was inevitable, I just knew it.
Finally, and dramatically, I made it down the mountain and shouted Hallelujahs to the sky.
As I sit here now with mud covering my hand to ease the pain I hope my allergies aren't life-threatening.
But in the case they are, consider this will official.
As there is a notary sitting right next to me to confirm it.

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