Monday, October 12, 2015


This is the only thing in the world that has my new name on it.
Not even Facebook has changed...
I figure since the government doesn't know me as this name, the world shouldn't.?
Anyways, I went to Zumba.
And holy poopsicle.
I felt like I was in an 80's workout video.
And now at this time I would just like to share my thoughts on Zumba.

Thoughts on Zumba:
"OK this is my first time here and I'm a bit lost but I think this is the room."
"Oh boy, everybody from the class before me looks super sweaty."
"Back left corner is mine. I dibs it!!"
"This classroom is made out of windows....everybody in the gym can see me!!"
"OK we're marching. This isn't too bad."
"This is hilarious."
"Oh the pace is picking up a bit."
"How am I tired already?"
"My shoe is 'untied'. I better take a five minute break to tie it."
"No! It's a latin song! I can't dance like this."
"Gah I got the foot work down and now there are arms??"
"That grandma is doing better than me."
"Uh oh. I just farted. Good thing I'm in the corner."
"Oh I missed a step...I'm gonna be behind the whole rest of the class."
"Another latin song?? I might as well leave now."
"Does she feel powerful, knowing that she's the only one in here who can do this?"
"I'm rull sweaty."
"Ten more minutes."
"I am not even doing this right. Maybe I'll just march."
"Ya know, I don't need to dance through my workout to enjoy it."
"OK class is officially over."
"Wait, why are they starting another song??"
"Nope. I'm not doing this. I'm outta here. I paid my dues."

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