winter

Now that Winter is here I feel that it is necessary to approach the topic of clothing.
People tend to wear weird things in the wintertime.
Such as.....
Toe socks.

Very impractical.
How are your piggies gonna keep each other warm if their separated from each other?
If anyone has ever worn these you will know that your toes get SO cold.

Something else impractical: Capri sweats....

"Ya know, I'm cold. I wanna wear sweats. But only my thighs are cold.....blanket pants on my calves would just be too much."

Along the same lines: Arm and leg warmers

"Only this chunk of my body is cold enough to cover up."

And I am definitely guilty of this next one: Puffer vests.

I am all about that puffer vest life.
But I can agree that adding arms would definitely make me a lot warmer.
It sure does keep that upper trunk of my body warm though.
Now just to worry about the frozen arms....

And can we all just agree that afghans help nobody stay warm with all of those air pockets....

around the home

I suppose here would be the place for me to write some cheesy quote that is embroidered on a pillow somewhere.
"Home is where the heart is."
"Home is not a place, it's a feeling."
"What I love most about my home is who I share it with."
But....Nah.
That's not how I wanna leave this blog.
I would much rather discuss the aspect of one's home that is actually the most important:
the quirks.
You know those silly things that you have to put up with, thinking aggressive thoughts to whatever is not working as it should in the 21st century.
But then after, they just make for such hilarious stories....
You know the ones.
Like the front door that is always locked and so the amount of times you have had to climb onto your balcony and break in is astounding.
Or the countertop that will snap in two if you put too much weight on it because of that one night where you all decided to play a "drinking game" while standing on top of it.
And there's always that cursed heating and cooling system:
The one that breaks the heater for the whole building in the middle of winter and so everyone is forced to share blankets and cuddle and cause you to feel like a pioneer....sort of.
And oppositely.... when the AC is also broken and so you're forced to sleep on the balcony all Summer.
Don't forget about the red stained sinks and floors that have mysteriously appeared throughout the semester from someone's personal dye job.
And that one chair that you have to sit on just-so or else it will cave in on you.....
These.
These are what makes all the nine houses I've lived in awesome.

cna

My name is McKenzie and I have an addiction.
My addiction is to getting any and every job that I can.
Once upon a time a month ago I even went as far as having 4 jobs at once.
I love weird jobs.
Since dropping out I have narrowed it down to two winners.
And the most recent job I've gotten is a CNA gig at an assisted living home.
It's definitely quite the new experience for me.
I mean, there was about 20 funny memes that explain this job very well.
But I'll leave that to you to google.
Instead, I'll just share these stupendously hilarious things the residents say to me.....
>*When taking one of the women to the bathroom*  "I've gotta piddle...I've gotta piddle."
>*When I told one resident that her undies were showing* She pulled her dress down and said, "No more free show."
>*While trying to play piano for one of the residents to sing to.* I guess I wasn't very good because he leaned in and said, "We've all got out struggles."
>"I can't wait to get to the other side of the veil. Wouldn't it be so fun to see all of your old boyfriends?"
>*When serving salad at dinner* "I don't want that. I'm not a rabbit."
>*It got a little chilly when I was changing one of the residents* "Oh Godfrey."

And my very favorite.....
>*When one of the residents walked in wearing a sweatshirt as pants I tried to take them off.* It was a little difficult so I asked him how he did it. His reply.... "Well it wasn't easy!!"